Reflection 2.0

(Note:  Yes, this is slightly off-topic, but I think it gives insight on me as the author of this blog.  If you’re looking for posts about technology in education, you can start with yesterday’s post! I’m learning a ton today and will share tomorrow…….) 

I’m at home today with the kids on a snowy, freezing Thursday and look back to when I stayed home full-time……..how did I DO it?  My dream was always to be a stay-at-home mom, but when a perfect job opportunity came up when my second child was 3 months old, I was surprised to find myself jumping at it.  I find that I’m much happier and probably a better mom these days, although I’m sure many (including my old self) would heatedly challenge that assertion.  I love my children fiercely and more than anything on earth, but my brain felt as if it were wasting away with only the challenges of naptimes, feedings, tantrums, and potty training.  Conversely, I honestly was feeling as if these challenges were too much for me - I was overanalyzing every single thing and taking every little blip completely personally.  All decisions regarding kids were on me, as I was supposedly the expert, and honestly, who gave me the qualifications?  I like to think I know everything, but when it comes to my own kids, there is no instruction manual or tutorial available. 

Now that the kids are with my husband for the getting-ready time in the morning, at daycare for breakfast through lunch, and then home with me for nap and afternoon play, supper, bath, bed, I feel like things are much more balanced.  I feel that I have partners in this now.  I can get ready for school in the morning in peace and quiet, I can stop at a gas station and run in really quick to get a gallon of milk, I can speak to adults about something OTHER than nursing vs. bottle, and I can feel like I’m MYSELF again.  I’m just not very good at being the one completely in charge of a household - I’m a terrible housekeeper and would rather do just about anything then clean a bathroom or vacuum my floors………now that I’m working again I have justification for why this stuff doesn’t get done!  And by the time the kids are up from nap in the afternoon I’m ready to play, love, cuddle and just be a mom, where in the past by that time of day I was ready to pull my hair out. 

So here I am, ready to do my “old” job again for a day……………wish me luck.  May there be no pee on the floor, hitting of brothers, tantrums, food thrown on the floor, coffee tipped over………..and most importantly, may there be peace and quiet between 1 and 3 pm.  Amen.

****Hmmmm, challenge today requires going back to archived posts and interlinking them - for example “read more on this here” and linking to different post.  This one is going to be a little time consuming as I hardly have enough to actually get ANY links in my post, but it will be my quest for the day, little bits here and there.